6) Halo

Pwn.

I’d say about 90% of the time, gamers play Halo for casual fun, which is of course, what video games are meant to be. However, there is a contingent who plays it obsessively, and an even smaller percentage that are just completely consumed by it. These are the people who play in tournaments for money, and if you happen to stumble into a game with them, you’ll have more fun sticking your 360 controller in a blender.

My friend used to take my headset and talk to four-star level fifty generals, saying things like, “Do you know what a vagina looks like?” It’s funny, but the thing is, people don’t realize exactly how much time it takes to play 10,000 games of Halo. Let’s say each game is 10 minutes long plus five minutes of in-between match making time. That’s 2,500 hours, or over 100 24-hour days of Halo. That’s probably how turn into this kid (turn the volume down for some super NSFW language):

5) Counterstrike

8 v 1? No problem for a pro.

Counterstrike has about the same level of addiction as Halo, except it’s even harder to play it casually. More often than not you won’t find a safe haven for new players (or noobs as you’ll undoubtedly be called). You have to be really damn good to even start to have fun, whereas in Halo you can just dick around on Vahalla in the Warthog turret if you want.

Not sure if you’re addicted? Well, it’s apparently a condition so widespread they’ve even developed a quiz for it here, with questions like “Does your clan have scrims?” and “Do you think of CS as a sport rather than a game?” Mmhm, and how many members of the cheerleading squad do you think the captain of the Counterstrike team lays in a given week?

4) Diablo

If this screenshot gives you an erection, you may have a problem.

Now we’re getting in deep. No more of this FPS baby stuff, this is some hardcore role-playing addictive shit. Any game with levels is inherently dangerous, especially one like Diablo where it takes as long to get from level 98 to 99 as it did from levels 1 to 98. You don’t want to mess around with something like that.

And now with Diablo III on the horizon, I fear I won’t be able to resist the call, as two months of my life were blacked out of my life from Diablo II, before I uninstalled the game when I realized I was missing out on better things. I came across a sad forum post while looking up info for this article. It reads:

“I’ve been addicted to Diablo 2 for the longest time, pretty much done everything you can do in that game, but I think it’s time to move on.”

I thought this would be followed by something like, “I’ve realized there’s a lot more to live than clicking a mouse 500,000 times,” but alas, it continued:

“Can anyone suggest something similar to Diablo 2 that still has the hacking/slashing and lots of different weapons/armors/etc? Must have free multiplayer.”

Sigh. Another soul lost.

3) Starcraft

It’s more exciting than it looks, I promise.

You might be noticing a pattern here with Blizzard games, a company that might be compared with Phillip Morris soon enough. I also loved Starcraft, but was never dangerously obsessed with it. Unfortunately that can’t be said for those else where, especially overseas.

In Korea, Starcraft is like a religion, and one player, Lee Seung Seop sacrificed everything for it. He sat down at a PC internet café to play Starcraft, fifty hours later, he was dead. During the marathon session he didn’t sleep, barely ate or drank, and his body simply gave out. And so we have our first video game induced death, unfortunately, there are more to come.

2) Everquest

Um, who needs real girls when you can have this? Hello?

Before World of Warcraft, there was Everquest, which became so addictive it was renamed “Evercrack” by the faithful. At it’s peak over 400,000 players were online, numbers that now seem relatively low compared to WoW’s numbers today. But at the time it was just as dangerous, held responsible for claiming at least two lives.

One is a Tampa, FL case where a father was so obsessed with the game that he neglected his infant and it died. The second is the tragic suicide of 21 year-old Shawn Wooley, who was playing the game up until a few minutes before he shot himself. His mother claimed he was playing twelve hours a day, and because he was epileptic, the game often caused him to suffer seizures. She recognized his addiction to it, and although she sought him help, there was nothing to be done.

“It’s like any other addiction,” Elizabeth Woolley. “Either you die, go insane or you quit. My son died.”

Everquest fully opened up the MMORPG philosophy of “games without an end,” which some argue almost unfairly hooks people to play until their lives are in shambles. Everquest paved the way for the final game on our list, which should be no surprise to anyone:

1) World of Warcraft

Why?

Ten million players currently subscribe to World of Warcraft, blowing Everquest’s old numbers out of the water. The game is currently at the height of its popularity, and the release of its latest Lich King expansion was the inspiration for this post. The game has truly perfected the art of the neverending game, with players sacrificing marriages, jobs and friends in pursuit of …what exactly?

There are many sad tales of WoW addiction spread across the internet. In Korea, a couple was charged with manslaughter after they lost track of time during a marathon WoW session and left their infant alone who accidentally suffocated. Another story involves two gamers who died a few years ago training for a difficult quest for days at a time. An online WoW memorial service was held for them, like they were soldiers fallen in battle. A screenshot of the funeral is below:

How about in their memory, go outside.

But many will claim that these deadly incidents are isolated, and it’s true, there aren’t tons of cases where people actually die from playing the game (although the fact that there are even some should be a bit jarring). However, the real results can be seen as more widespread, across average people who have seen their lives consumed by the game. And with 10M players in a game that requires and enormous time commitment, you can bet these cases are much more prevalent. I suggest you read this post called “My Boyfriend Won’t Quite World of Warcraft” if you want to see the kind of thing I’m talking about.

It’s strange to see someone’s behavior change through a game like this. The symptoms of withdrawal are much like those of a drug addict just begging for another hit. Listen to this incredibly disturbing video of a teenager crying and begging his parents to let him keep playing WoW. A lot of people think that it’s funny, but I’ll be honest, it literally sent chills down my spine.

I’ve stayed far away from WoW thus far. Not just because my computer is steam-powered and couldn’t run it if I tried, but because of my brief stint of addiction to an “endless” game like Diablo, I wouldn’t trust myself near it.

I know there are perfectly fun and safe ways to play games like World of Warcraft, but just be careful it doesn’t become more than a game. The same is true for all of these games, including some I’ve undoubtedly missed. Hell, I’m sure Tetris can rule your life if you play it enough. Remember, if you’re doing ANYthing for 10 hours a day, it’s probably not good for you.